Disney World

When my daughter was the cutest  little girl ever, she walked back to me after a couple of minutes talking to Santa Claus and, beckoning me to lean down close, quietly said with much conviction “He’s a fake.”

I was reminded of this event when my wife and I recently spent a few days at Disney World. It’s a fake.

I have spent my entire life not going to Disney World for that exact reason. I ended up there because it represented an opportunity to spend many hours with the grandson while his parents attended the Daytona 500 (twice!).

We stayed at Riverside in Port Orleans (and I believe there was a further subdivision of Riverside…but it seemed meaningless and arbitrary). The “river” is really a, I suspect  man made, channel. There is no current, one end is at a lake, the other end is just an end.

At Riverside is a large water wheel in the river that does not flow. Water is pumped up into a sluice which runs several feet and dumps the water on the wheel.  The wheel, via a couple of gears, turns a large axle that reaches into the center of the dining hall and, again via a couple of gears, turns an large umbrella that sets just beneath the ceiling. Much ado for nothing. But the turning wheel is an impressive sight.

We spent time in Downtown Disney, just an outdoor mall really; a day in the Animal Kingdom, which is a mediocre zoo; and a day in Epcot, most of which is also an outdoor mall.

For much of my life various people have told me that I had to go to Epcot Center. That I would like it. Well, not so much. The Spaceship Earth ride was interesting, but I would much more enjoy going through it with the lights on to see how it is laid out inside that golf ball.

Disney is expensive, but at least one can see where a lot of the money is going. There are the free buses, the free water taxis, the fireworks, the extensive grounds, the numerous swimming pools, the endless fake.

This is not to say that I did not have a great time.  I was with great people that I love.  Time in hell would have been pleasant. Disney was a blast.